Going for The Erotic “Home Run”
You built enough comfort and attraction and the woman is now in your bed… What now? Where do you begin? What should you do first?
I like to think of sex as a nice slow game of baseball. The good games usually consist of good timing, patience, and a good amount of skill. Long baseball games are only boring to those who don’t really know what’s going on.
I find that it’s the same with sex.
To be good at it, you need to understand timing, you need to be patient, and you should also have some pretty good skills!
The problem I find with most guys is that they simply move into everything WAY too fast, and before the woman even has a chance to moan, it’s all done. OR, they simply don’t know what the hell they are doing at all!
There is definitely a difference between just sex, good sex, and GREAT sex… And I will try to point out these differences as I go along…
For a guy, all sex is pretty much the same: we see, we conquer, and we cum… But for a woman, it’s much more complex than that…
I talk a lot about building comfort and attraction in my book Modern World Dating, and how important it is if you want to get to the “bed phase”, aka “phase 8” of the MWD Model.
The thing is though, just because you made it to the bed, does not mean you have to stop building comfort and attraction. You must continue building the comfort and attraction even during the sex. And you do this in 2 ways:
1) By continuing to do different things that turn them on, &
2) By taking your time
By following those 2 guidelines you will convey to the woman that you are in no rush whatsoever (which will lower her guard and make her feel more comfortable with you) and that you know how to turn a woman on (which will excite her and make her go into a state of sexual ecstasy).
Most women almost never reach an orgasm during sex because most guys don’t follow those 2 simple guidelines! Think about it…
For a woman to be able to reach an orgasm, her comfort level has to be VERY high. And she has to be continuously stimulated in the right places, in the right ways, for a certain amount of time.
It could take 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 20 minutes, 30 minutes, 45 minutes, etc… Depending on the woman, and depending on how comfortable and turned on she is.
Some of you guys might be thinking, “Well, I can only last for 5-10 minutes IF IM LUCKY so is there any hope for me?”
Luckily, you don’t actually need to be having continuous sex for a woman to reach an orgasm. If you feel like you are about to reach your limit, stop, take it out, and retreat back to foreplay. Give her oral sex, stimulate her erogenous zones, use those piano fingers (make sure nails are trimmed first)… Or a combination of all three.
After you’ve done that for a bit, and you took back some control over captain willy, get back to the sensually erotic sex… And so on… Repeat that as many times as you need to, so you can make sex a sensual, pleasurable, and memorable experience for your partner.
To make sex long, great, and memorable, try to incorporate all these things:
- Constantly change positions (doggy, on a chair, on a table, standing, against a wall, etc…)
- Change locations (change rooms, change scenery, outside, etc…)
- Stimulate her clit – Use your tongue (oral sex) or finger
- Stimulate her nipples and the area around them (areola)
- Lick her lightly around areas such as the neck, breasts, thighs, & ears
- Use your warm breath by breathing in and out extremely close to her neck and ear area during any of the above (will give her goose bumps)
- Use scented candles in background
- Play sensual music, trance, or something with a nice beat in background (depending on your taste)
- Use massaging techniques with warm and scented massage oils
- Strawberries and chocolate (use sex food)
- Use sex toys
AND SO ON!
If you follow these guidelines, the women you sleep with will not know what just hit them… Except in the literal sense, obviously. And they will definitely remember it and want it again!
That’s the whole point isn’t it? To make her want it again, and again, and again… Something she can look forward to, and perhaps even talk about to her friends (according to statistics, to the majority of women in sexual relationships, sex eventually becomes routine, and boring).
All in all, make sure you excite her enough before you start giving her what she wants… And even then, make sure you don’t stop giving her what she wants until she becomes addicted!
Make sure ALL the bases are loaded before you go in for the home run…
Enjoy!
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To discover “The Bed” phase in more detail, make sure to check out my book, Modern World Dating by clicking on Dating Tips For Men
“A Life Worth Living, Is A Life Worth Improving.”
